Tuesday, 15 July 2008

It's raining inside my heart..

Now, it's raining heavily outside.. And me, raining as well, I just cant stop my tears from coming out..

When I woke up this morning, I felt really guilty.. I have no idea why suddenly I was like that... Last nite, I was chatting with this guy.. He's a really nice guy.. I do like him actually.. For the past two days, we both were talking on the phone from 1 am until 6 am... Even we know each other for almost one year, but only now we had a chat on the phone..

Everything went very smooth, we really enjoyed talkin to each other.. We actually like each other but there's something bothering us.. HE IS MY EX'S BEST FRIEND... For me, I'm totally fine with it.. But he's so scare if one day, my ex know about us.. Even now we only contact each other and not even in a relationship, he really scared...

I understand his situation.. He doesn't want his best friend blamming him or avoiding him because he close to me right now... But, I want him to know, I do like him and we can try to working onour relation just like what he told me last night..

FQ: Sbnrnya, saya dah lama nak jadikan awak sebagai teman hidup saya, tapi tak berani nak cakap, tak tau kenapa..

NS: Kenapa tak terus terang je??? saya ni pelik sangat ke sampai awak takut nak bagitahu??

FQ: Ok, kalau saya nak jadikan awak sebagai teman hidup saya, boleh???

Guess what my answer??? Of course I asked him back, are you sure my dear??? Have you think deeply about it.. I dont mind, I think we both happy when we're together...

But then, he suddenly asked weird questions.. Of course my answers were ridiculous as well.. Then he came out with a statement:

"Sama2, 2 sebab dari awal lagi saya tak berani, lafaz benda2 macam ni, sebab saya dah agak benda2 macam ni akan berlaku, saya tgk msg awak dari awal lagi saya dah agak, awak masih berhati2 untuk bagi keputusan dgn baik, saya sedar sapa diri saya.."

That statement make me really not in a mood today.. Why must suddenly he said like that?? I'm soo unhappy till now.. Make the situation worst, I message him and until this time no yet reply.. What the thing that made him mad at me??? why he acting that way???

To him, PLEASE reply me.. I do need the answer... PLEASE....

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